Skip to main content

Bad-Day Sex


Today isn't really a good day. I can't seem to concentrate on work and my mind wanders when I'm listening to someone or looking at something.
I can't stop thinking about Friday night. I can't stop thinking about how you fucked your name out of my lungs, forcing me to scream your name like my life depended on it. 

Gawd! It was amazing!
Been a while I had dick that good.
Been a while I had someone turn up the volume to drown my voice and keep the neighbors from casting and binding delinquent youths.
Been a while I got my fundament spanked like I was in a sadomasochist movie.

Bam! Bam! Bam! 
"Yes Daddy! Fuck me like you miss me! Yes! Oh yes! Uh-uh! Right there! Ooh Baby! FUCK ME!"

Dick so good my eyes were rolled back half the time while I was positioned like a big-sized boiled prawn with coochie juice dripping on the couch.

"Babe, are you ok?"

My colleague taps me on the shoulder. 

"Hmm?"

She's the third person to ask today.

"You've been looking lost all day. What's the matter?"

"I'm fine."

No. I'm not really fine.

I've got 99 problems and a dick is one.

How do I snap out of this now?

Option A: Get more dick
Option B: Get more dick
Option C: Get more dick

F U C K !

*Scrolling through Whatsapp chats, clicks on fourth name*

Hey. I miss you. When can we hook up?

Comments

  1. Chai...
    "my eyes were rolled back half the time while I was positioned like a big-sized boiled prawn with coochie juice dripping on the couch..."

    I say no more!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Bedroom Comedy

You know when you have to wait months to hit that thing and then you fuck up. As in eh, when you mess up seriously! Yeah, that *I wanna die feeling* happened to me o. Choi! Met this girl, can’t even remember how we met. She was sha on ma bbm. Correct babe, boobies to die for, light skinned hottie, better yansh *wipes sweat* And yes she was in lust with me. Sexy slim toh bad, the ladies are (ok were) tripping. Back to the story. The girl wanted the D, so p-setting was really easy. I didn’t have to convince her unendingly. She wasn’t in Lagos at that time. She was somewhere in Delta/Edo. And then you know, the sexual frustration grew cos we didn’t see. We exchanged messages, how much we wanted to bang each other ...that kinda thing. She had the dirtiest mouth, I literarily moved around with a hard-on. I made mouth mayne. DAMN!!! Telling her I would do that, how I would keep hitting it for 25minutes non-stop. The multiple orgasm I would give her, oh la la.  She wanted me

Frescoed Stories

Ok. I accept. I'm a liar. But really, that isn't the approriate and befitting description for me. I don't lie...Well,I just leave out a lot of "unnecesary" details. You could call it whatever you wanna, but I insist it's an essential trait of a realist (just to say sharp gurl/guy, I went to school noni :p ). Hey! You have had 6 "bedmates" and you are confusd about the current one (Mr. Right Now No.7)... You need advice,so your girlfriend(s) is the first link to clear thinking. In the course of explaining your predicament, it dawns on you that your girlfriend has made out with just 3 guys and has had sex with 1 (Jeez- Life must be a Bitch, Eh?)... You can't talk about this issue without relating it to your other escapades...therefore, a dilemma presents itself. Since you can't stop the story abruptly,you'ld have to: 1. Tell the truth, recounting your 'many' stories. You'ld watch the shock rise from her upper face to t

Trade by Barter

It started out as a conversation. I and my friend were discontented about our financial status. I talked about how pleasant it would be if I had ‘sufficient’ and steady income. She talked about how she could not bring herself to ask men for money. We talked about the Aristo Chics we knew that summed up enough courage to collect humongous amounts from their customers. God was listening to our conversation. He had to make a comedy out of it, so he provided me what Unilag girls would call ‘opportunity’. Later that day, I was buying yoghurt around Honours when a white jeep honked at me. I walked up to the car and saw that an old man (most likely older than my father) was the driver and only occupant of the vehicle. “Good afternoon Sir”. “Good afternoon my dear. Do you stay in this hostel?” “No Sir.” “Where do you stay?” “Moremi Sir.” I lied, “Is there any problem Sir?” “No my dear. I would just like to know you better. I want you to be my friend” I could not help but laug